Sunday, December 13, 2009

How the Vikings Saved the World Way Before Copenhagen

Unusual Historical Precedent in the Crusade To End Global Warming and Balance Economic Opportunity

They were known throughout enlightened academia as "the Al Gores of the Middle Ages," and the world owes huge steaming piles of unspeakable and unmentionable debts of gratitude to the early global warming fighters - to the Vikings. As our concerned global leaders and thinkers, like Mahmoud Ahmedinejad, Fidel Castro, not to speak of Al Gore, crusade for planetary survaival, in between feasting on platters of pickled herring, the ancient Vikings also fought a long campaign with similar goals and strategies in an earlier, little-known climate crisis. While at the Global Warming Summit, leaders are are consorting in the ancient Viking capital of Copenhagen, pleading for more state empowerment for a one-world government takeover of petty nationalistic rights in order to combat global warming, hundreds of years before, the Vikings were, in their own unique way, seeking the same thing.

Leaving their cozy, quaint hobbit holes in Norway and Denmark, these proto-hippie nature lovers ventured out by the hundreds of thousands to sacrificially fight with inhuman courage to lower worldwide global warming trends during the Medieval Warm Period, thus saving the planet. They delicately closed down thousands of polluting blacksmith shops, bakeries, libraries and razed hundreds of thousands of polluting homes and chimney stacks, not to mention, they drastically reduced human population in many areas so as to limit carbon footprints. They pursued their climate reduction campaign from southern Europe to the far coasts of Greenland, Ireland and even Nova Scotia. As early ecologists, their intense love for Mother Earth, or Gaia, or Thor, compelled them on their sacrificial worldwide campaign against earlier global warming, even though the warmer temperatures had helped them by melting much ice thus helping them to navigate the North Sea and the farther reaches of the eastern North Atlantic Ocean. At times they had to slaughter naysayers and skeptics who were the equivalents of the white-hooded, subhuman Holocaust-deniers and genocidal homophobic flat-earthers of our days, otherwise known as global-warming skeptics.

Many modern scientists, receiving millions of dollars in government grant money, agree that the massive rise in temperatures in the 800-1100 period was leading to the literal extinction of all living beings had it been allowed to continue unabated. As the Vikings sought through persuasion and education to convert the backwards peoples of Europe and elsewhere as to the dangers of rampant capitalism and greedy polluters of the earth, their herculean efforts gradually paid off, leveling the temperatures and thus saving the planet and life as we know it.


Anonymous said...

All too true, Dr. Lumplevin. As we say, It takes a Viking to raze a village.

Anonymous said...

I have Verizon High Speed Internet. Wireless, DSL. I have a Modem. Both my laptop and computer are Windows Vista. HP. I know it as nothing to do with my computer becasue i'm usuing a new Laptob and My computer is not the problem, both are Very fast, and clean, No spyware or viruses. I am currently using IE7. Even my M Firefox is slow. I download Google chrome and its still slow. I double checked, my wires they are all secure there are no loose wires. I have a Linksy Router, and it is secured with WPA-PSK. I know no one hacked in, so thats not the case for slow ness. Also, You know how a Modem has green, blinking lights. Sometimes My Internet goes a way, the internet light gos away for minutes or an hour, then the Internet comes back. Its frustrating. My friend has the same Internet as me...she lives a couple doors away...and her Internet is like lightning very fast....AND NO she does not have fios...her internet is the same. as mines. It takes forever for utube and hulu video to load. I have flashplayer 10. something.... SO........................... I'm asking u guys b4 i call the company.... [url=]santoramaa[/url]

Anonymous said...

I am reading this article second time today, you have to be more careful with content leakers. If I will fount it again I will send you a link

Anonymous said...

Norton Antivirus 2010 and Norton Internet Security 2010 are designed for use in Windows 7. Norton Antivirus 2009, Norton Internet Security 2009 and Norton 360 version 3.0 can all download a compatibility update through the Internet to make them compatible with Windows 7. I'd really recommend getting the latest version, i.e. NAV2010 or NIS2010 to be sure. [url=]santoramaa[/url]

Anonymous said...

Do You interesting of [b]Viagra 50mg side effects[/b]? You can find below...
[size=10]>>>[url=][b]Viagra 50mg side effects[/b][/url]<<<[/size]

[b]Bonus Policy[/b]
Order 3 or more products and get free Regular Airmail shipping!
Free Regular Airmail shipping for orders starting with $200.00!

Free insurance (guaranteed reshipment if delivery failed) for orders starting with $300.00!

Generic Viagra (sildenafil citrate; brand names include: Aphrodil / Edegra / Erasmo / Penegra / Revatio / Supra / Zwagra) is an effective treatment for erectile dysfunction regardless of the cause or duration of the problem or the age of the patient.
Sildenafil Citrate is the active ingredient used to treat erectile dysfunction (impotence) in men. It can help men who have erectile dysfunction get and sustain an erection when they are sexually excited.
Generic Viagra is manufactured in accordance with World Health Organization standards and guidelines (WHO-GMP). Also [url=]Viagra Sales Market[/url] you can find on our sites.
Generic [url=]Viagra and Analogs[/url] is made with thorough reverse engineering for the sildenafil citrate molecule - a totally different process of making sildenafil and its reaction. That is why it takes effect in 15 minutes compared to other drugs which take 30-40 minutes to take effect.
[b]janet smith viagra
Viagra Splitter
viagra kamagra vs
light switch plate viagra
Viagra No Prescription Needed
band mitra viagra falls
canadain online pharmacies viagra
Even in the most sexually liberated and self-satisfied of nations, many people still yearn to burn more, to feel ready for bedding no matter what the clock says and to desire their partner of 23 years as much as they did when their love was brand new.
The market is saturated with books on how to revive a flagging libido or spice up monotonous sex, and sex therapists say “lack of desire” is one of the most common complaints they hear from patients, particularly women.
[url=]Viagra Kamagra[/url]